Clipped Wings and Mediocrity

I wanted to write - to say how it really is, how I really am but the truth is I don't know. My life is changing, I'm changing. I need more than this yet I'm not sure exactly what I need. It's funny how the world turns and suddenly we have a new perspective.

I love and am loved, that much I know. But something's changed and I'm not willing to settle in areas where I've been willing to accept the status quo before. As this brooding continues, my anger and frustration are finally giving birth to a new drive and determination (the patience is lagging behind though - and I still feel agitated). Have you ever been in a situation where your most exceptional qualities are unnoticed? Or if they are noticed, the feedback is kept under wraps - DELIBERATELY? I know where my strengths lie and I'm not doing anyone any favours by allowing myself to be held hostage. I've got to get on with my life, to seek out situations that honour my talents and raise my energy rather than deflate it.

It shouldn't be a revelation to me to find out that essentially, nobody else is making my best interests their highest priority - I'm sure it's self centred to expect it. But the sober reality is that I'm really the only one who is correctly attuned to my own potential and I'm certainly the only one capable of committing to that future. An advanced soul might ask, might even shift to support that but a lesser person will simply try to coerce or manipulate you, giving you morsels of hope and promise or occasional ego strokes.

Do I sound bitter? Cynical? Disillusioned? Immature? I feel all of the above but want to release any toxicity and move on into my own highest destiny - the one that I choose, based on a sense of adventure and passion. I don't know where it will lead but I do know its time for me to consider birthing a new self, an empowered self that will not settle for clipped wings or mediocrity. I am capable of so much more than that. And most days, I actually believe it...