What My Mother Never Knew #21: Jailbait Intruders

I recall so little that didn't involve drug use. For example, we traveled to see a Black Sabbath concert one weekend and had bought an ounce of pot about two weeks ahead of the concert because it was a good deal and we had the money. We divided it in two, rolled it up, fought over who rolled the best joints (mine were always tighter) and smoked a couple then and there to make sure they'd turned out OK. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised that we were nearly dry again by the time we got to the concert. Finding more, luckily, was not a problem. And that's it, I don't remember any of the concert - just the drugs, running out and getting more. I think we may have went skiing for a day while there, but likewise, all I recall is the joint we smoked with a ski patrol on the chair lift. I honestly don't think I cared about anything other than getting high.

But I suppose, when I think back to other events, I recall a few other strange things, like where my bed was in my bedroom during different time periods. My surprise lover, gained entry when the bed was on the far left, against the wall. My sleepover orgy happened when the bed was against the far wall, near the closet with the spyhole. When the bed was in the middle, right under the window, other memories surface, ones that I've not considered in years. One of these memories also brings to mind the smell of underarm deodorant.

I'd met the guy at an AA dance which my friend had dragged me out to. Her mom was in AA and she in alateen and she suggested we go to a Saturday night dance. We drank "Silent Sam" vodka first, thinking that we would be safe from detection (duhhhh-right!!). Well if anyone did smell, they didn't make a fuss and so we proceeded to dance and scout for boys. I ended up meeting Clint, who had just come out of a federal prison. He was was 24 and had pulled an armed robbery which had landed him in prison for quite a few years. We left the club to smoke some dope and ended up dating for a while. He was so sexy but had an edge I'd not been exposed to before.

He'd developed a heroin habit before and during his incarceration and I'm not entirely sure that he was off it. I didn't see any but his face had this hollow bony look that I associated with hard core addicts. Clint was a bit hard to figure out. I was developing feelings for him but it wasn't clear to me where he was coming from. It wasn't long before I discovered enough to know what I needed to do. We'd been out with my best friend and his best friend and I guess I thought that at some point they might get together. Through the course of the party they did but then the conversation got a bit weird. Clint suggested that if we were in a really zany mood, we should switch partners later on, just for the hell of it. It was a casual comment and nobody really responded. Later, however, he made reference to the planned switch and I realized he really intended to go through with it. I didn't know what to say. His friend Steve was cute, but also newly out of prison and I just wasn't really into recreational sex. I liked Clint and didn't really want to share him with anyone. But somehow, not voicing concern earlier left me feeling like I'd committed to the experiment by default.

They snuck us into the federal halfway house through the fire escape on the third floor. I think they had found a way to disable the fire alarm on the window and we all climbed in quietly. I was petrified! Weren't there guards downstairs or something? We sat in one of their rooms for a while and then Clint grabbed my friend's hand and I was alone with Steve. We kissed on his bed for a while but it was completely empty. Finally, he confessed that he wasn't into it. He had a girlfriend back home and while he thought I was nice, he felt like it was wrong. I was so relieved! So while my best friend and 'boyfriend' had sex down the hall, we sat in his bed for an hour and talked about how he missed his girlfriend and planned to change his ways. Needless to say, I got out of that involvement pretty quick after that. I was pretty hurt by the whole stupid thing. I didn't really blame my girlfriend, but in retrospect, I realized that Clint had really wanted to sleep with her all along and didn't really have any feelings towards me. Well, live an learn. I still pass by the half way house sometimes and shake my head at the gall we had at 14, sneaking into a federal institution to sleep with 24 year old convicts!